Dear blog,

happy new year 2016!

But I had a bad dream,
My granny's last breathe, and i held her in my arms crying so badly.
I do not know what to do.
I know its new year and i shouldnt have such thoughts ruining my start of the year.
My dream always come true and i'd never want it to.
Im sad but ive no one to confide in.
I always run away from all this negatives and make myself busy and mind occupied.

Im scared, im trembling, i doubt anyone will ever understand

):

im sad, i hope she's gonna be alright.
i know she cant be with us forever.
But i know and i hate myself for being too sentimental.
its me its me i gotta start learning how to let go.
it saddened me deeply to know that she's so weak now, compared to the past year.
start treasuring everyone around you, cause anytime anyone can go,
Anytime or even the next minute, its fated and uncontrollable.

I can only tell myself i gotta be strong, even though i think i cant do it. but i really need to overcome

love,
granddaughter